Bisexuality Is Not a Phase: Dispelling the Myth of Transitioning to Being Gay

There’s a harmful myth that bisexuality is just a stopover on the way to being gay or lesbian. For years, bisexual people have and continue to face the misconception that their identity is temporary, a transition phase before they “fully” come out as gay. But this idea is false and damaging. Let’s explore why bisexuality is a valid, stable identity and how the myth of transitioning does more harm than good.

Many people believe that bisexual individuals are simply “not ready” to come out as gay or lesbian. This comes from a misunderstanding of bisexuality and reinforces the false belief that attraction must be exclusive to one gender. It suggests that bisexuality is a halfway point, a stop on the road to a monosexual identity. But this narrative erases the experiences of bisexual people and dismisses their identity as something less than real.

Bisexuality is a legitimate sexual orientation. It is attraction to more than one gender, and this identity is stable for many people. Studies have shown that bisexuality is not a transitional phase; it’s an enduring orientation for those who identify with it. Bisexual people are just as likely to form long-term relationships as their gay or straight counterparts, and their relationships whether with people of the same gender or a different gender do not negate their bisexuality.

It’s important to recognize that bisexuality isn’t about indecision or confusion. It’s about recognizing the capacity for attraction beyond the binary of gay or straight.The idea that bisexual people are simply on a journey toward being gay or lesbian leads to bisexual erasure, where the existence of bisexuality is denied or ignored. It fosters biphobia, not only from the straight community but also from within the LGBTQ+ community, where bisexual people are sometimes viewed with skepticism or mistrust.

This narrative also causes significant self-doubt for many bisexual people, especially when they are pressured to “choose a side.” Being told that their identity is not real can lead to feelings of invalidation, confusion, and even shame.

Bisexual people deserve recognition for who they are, without questioning their identity or assuming it will evolve into something else. By sharing stories of bisexual people in long-term relationships, stable careers, and fulfilling lives, we can help dismantle the myth that bisexuality is a phase.